Stats and Recaps
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Statistics!

Mid-Season Stats:

Passing:
Gordon D. Gopher: 97 completions on 197 attempts for 939 yards, 3 TD's and 3Ints

Rushing:
Chris Rabbit: 168 carries for 441 yards, 2.6 average, 2 touchdowns
Christine Okoye: 27 carries for 64 yards, 2.4 average and 2 touchdowns
Cal Gary: 5 carries for 35 yards, 7.0 average and 0 touchdowns
Dennis Legbreak: 1 carry for 0.0 yards, 0.0 average, 0 touchdowns

Receiving:
DH Hill: 21 catches, 274 yards, 13.0 average, 40 long, 0 TD's
Harry Hordak: 17 catches, 131 yards, 7.7 average, 12 long, 0 TD's
Chris Rabbit: 13 catches, 105 yards, 8.1 average, 12 long, 1 TD
Vic Venger: 5 catches, 84 yards, 16.8 average, 32 long, 0 TD's
Christine Okoye: 10 catches, 81 yards, 8.1 average, 19 long, 0 TD's
Dan J. Dragons: 8 catches, 73 yards, 9.1 average, 16 long, 0 TD's
Ted "Red" Rider: 7 catches, 66 yards, 9.4 average, 16 long, 0 TD's
Joe Halfbat: 5 catches, 57 yards, 11.4 average, 15 long, 1 TD
Cal Gary: 6 catches, 42 yards, 7.0 average, 16 long, 0 TD's
Allan S. Morrissette: 5 catches, 26 average, 5.2 average, 7 long, 1 TD

Tackles/Sacks: (Includes special teams tackles, which is why it the list shows offensive performers)
DE Eddie Beric: 65/36
SS Brendal Lord 44/0
DE Roy Batty 43/14
LB James Buttcas
FS Bjorn Toby Wilde 26/0
LB Aldo Nova 25/2
CB Gobo 23/0
LB Sonny Gambini 22/0
DT Mitchell Hicks 13/5
CB Kert Browning 12/0
DT Ron Maiden 11/8
SS "Bloody" Bill Anderson 7/0
LB Shaun I. Twain 6/0
PK Claude Humongous 5/0
CB Ben Gentle 5/0
LB Preacher Lazariah 5/0
DT Dave Leppard 4/3
RB Cal Gary 4/0
LB Jack Hackett 4/0
WR Vic Venger
OG Mike Mummra 3/0
OG William Loring 3/0
DT James Longstreet 2/0
FB Dennis Legbreak 2/0
TE Ted "Red" Rider 2/0
DT Norris Dimbley 1/1
RB Noodle Doodle 1/0
OT Vlad D. Impaler 1/0
TE Harry Hordak 1/0
OT Sam skeletor 1/0
C Cyril Sneer 1/0
OT Craig hammerstein 1/0
WR Joe Halfbat 1/0
TE Alan S. Morissette 1/0
RB Nick Appleton 1/0

Interceptions
James Buttcas: 2 for 18 yards, 12 long, 0 td's
Kert Browning: 1 for 79 yards, 1 TD
Sonny Gambini: 1 for 21 yards, 0 TD's
Bjorn Toby Wilde: 1 for 11 yards, 0 td's



Above: CB Ben Gentle at Beavers camp.
Game Recaps!

Week 8 recap:

It’s a good thing for the Ottawa Fighting Beavers that game results aren’t based on style points.

Ottawa may have taken the Frogs lightly after laying a pounding on the Chicago Comedians the previous week, or perhaps they were just becoming road-weary. Nonetheless, though they came away with a win, this isn’t a game that will be included in their time capsule.

Jock Villeneuve’s fumbling of the opening kick off was a sign of things to come. Villeneuve had yet to see the field all season and this wasn’t a smart way to get his coach’s attention. The OFB defense was able to prevent a lot of damage being done by stiffening in front of their goal line (tee-hee) and only allowed a field goal try which went wide regardless.

When the offense did get the ball, they resumed their trend of going backwards, and Fandango punted on 4th and 25. It was a horrible punt which allowed the Frogs to nickel and dime their way to an 11-yard TD run and a 7-0 lead.

In fact, the Frogs seemed to have a good game plan for Ottawa. Mixing runs and short passes effectively, not letting Beric or Batty get too many chances at the QB and keeping the Ottawa defense off-balance. Their own mistakes did them in though when corner Gobo stripped a Frog WR and and recovered the fumble himself, biting his old team in the ass in the process (figuratively).

Ottawa hit on a rare big play soon after when Gopher hit Hill for 68 yards. Hill got pushed out of bounds just in front of the goal line. Gopher then remembered that he sucks, fumbling on the next play and getting called for grounding on the one after that. Maybe he just needed the extra room because he was able to hit Ron Quest in the far corner of the endzone for a tying TD.

Aldo Nova kept the momentum going when, on Fort Lauderdale’s first play following the kickoff, he recovered a fumble from the Frog’s HB and took it in all the way in the opposite direction for another score and a 14-7 lead. The FLF mounted a drive of its own and capped it with a 13 yard TD run, but they bafflingly went for two on the convert and the pass was incomplete.

The early minutes of the 2nd half provided the final Ottawa score when Aldo Nova recorded another fumble recovery from a Frogs runner. He took the ball to the one as well, and in typical Beavers offensive fashion, it took four plays to get the one yard needed to score. Christine Okoye had the honours as she slammed up the middle of the line. Not to leave Rabbit wanting, he was the recipient of a two yard catch on the two point conversion attempt to put the team up 22-13.

The Frogs stiffed around midfield on their next drive and pinned Ottawa deep in their territory after the punt, which of course set the stage for a safety. Naturally, Rabbit was tackled inside his endzone and two two-pointer scored by Ottawa became irrelevant. The Beavers defense, however, was able to keep Fort Lauderdale just outside of scoring range the rest of the game and the 22-15 score became a final one.




Week 7 recap:

Well, well, well - a shut out of the much vaunted Chicago Offense! And who should be instrumental in this but Joe De'Red's arch-enemy, Eddie Beric?! The man Beric made a mockery of the restrictions on DE speed, dumping the alleged gayboy QB's replacement Nash 8 times in the course of the game and helping to keep the hosts to less than 50 yards total net offense.

While Ottawa's O didn't exactly set the world alight themselves (226 yards), the fact that their D forced Cleophus James to punt 12 times tells its own story. (Okay, Fandango punted 10 times as well, but 17 1st downs to 5 shows the difference today.) Ottawa favoured a grind it out rush game today, knowing that the key was going to be possession, and Chris Rabbit carried the ball 37 times! He was rewarded early on for his efforts with a TD from 3 yards, forcing his way through a jammed middle of the line.

More bad luck befell the Comedians early in the second, when they got the ball back on their own 3. Fettucini tried to run to daylight, but found the sun blocked out by Mr. Beric, who flattened the HB in the endzone for a big safety. It took until halfway through the 3rd for the next score - a 10 yard scamper by Rabbit (on a pass by Gopher) that gave the visitors a 2 score lead and had Chicago reeling. Even when Gopher fumbled on his own 27, they couldn't capitalise - they got 10 yards closer before Beric popped up for another of his sacks, and Sline's eventual 42 yard FG attempt dropped short. Two plays later, Joseph Halfbat fumbled the ball after the catch for Kruger to recover for the Comedians. Still they got nowhere, and that was pretty much the tale of the day for the home side.

A big pass from Gopher to D.H. Hill saw the WR go 40 yards and fall just short of paydirt, but Gopher just gave the ball to Christine Okoye and the huge FB powered her way in for the final score of the game.



Week 6 recap:

Usually when a team manages to shut out their opponent (especially when they are playing on the road), it is cause for celebration, and the Alohas were clearly glad to get out of The Dam with a win under their belts. But offensively this left a lot to be desired, particularly from the O-Line which let the Beaver Fever through 14 times to Il Duce.

Zippy was also hampered somewhat with a sprained wrist (insert your own joke here) but no excuses - from an O that is as supposedly hot as Honolulu's, this was less than mediocre. Lucky for them they caught Ottawa on the hop and kept Gopher backed up in his own half for much of the game.

Two great punts from Bungle Bear led directly to over half of the Alohas' points, as Gopher was dropped in his own endzone in the second half by QB Shredder and then Konishiki Dumptruck, and Chelsea Supporter made it slightly more secure for the visitors with a late FG from 44 yards. Okay, it only made it 7-0, but the Beavers looked unlikely to score all day (Humongous spurned three FG attempts, the shortest of which was blocked by G Hal Aylujacorus).

Biggest worry for Honolulu must by the porous nature of the so-called "Ring of Confidence" O-Line - unless they can do a better job, players of the calibre of Beric, Batty and Maiden will find those cavities and work on them until the QB needs dentures. Beth Joyner can probably hardly wait until week 10!

The Alohas' run D shut down Chris Rabbit as effectively as Ottawa's did to Zippy, and Gopher was under just enough pressure to not be able to capitalise on the traditionally-weak Honolulu secondary.



Week 5 recap:

When Captain Canuck first glanced at his new team's schedule for their first season, he couldn't help but note that 3 of the first 4 games were on the road. There was some concern on his part that the time might struggle to get off to a fast start under those circumstances.

The Beavers had traveled the previous two weeks, in fact. First to Papua New Guinea, then to the town of Springfield in some undetermined state. Neither is exactly across the street from rarely-sunny Ottawa. The team returned home with a split, which the coaching staff was largely pleased with, though they felt that they could have had both games if not for a tactical error on their part in the handling of DE Eddie Beric's injury.

Returning home, Captain Canuck and his crew sought to motivate the players to treat this as a college homecoming game. St-Louis had won only one game coming in, and the staff feared a letdown after rediscovering the comforts of home. There was some thought that the team might overlook the Louies.

Early on, those fears appeared to be well-founded. Though the first offensive series for St-Louis was a three-and-out caused by two Beric sacks (of his team record nine), the Beavers found themselves in the familiar position of struggling to move the ball as well. Canuck may have sensed this early as he chose to attempt a fake punt on only the team's second drive, which resulted in another incomplete pass. Despite the botched play, the Beavers managed to regain the advantage in the field of position battle throughout the remainder of the first half, and got on the board when DE Roy Batty took the St-Louis QB down on his own goal line to take a 2-0 lead.

QB Gordon D. Gopher, who has come under criticism by the fans and media for his low completion percentage this season, started out the 2nd half hot. Assisted by a 52-yard return of the kickoff by WR Vic Venger, Gopher hit 3 straight passes to WR Joe Halfbat, the last of which was good for a 12 yard TD. The convert made the score 9-0 for the home team.

Venger provided additional help following the ensuing St-Louis drive when he returned the opposition's punt 32 yards to the St-Louis 36. This set up a field goal attempt which increased his team's lead to 12-0. Venger's day would turn sour somewhat when he'd fumble a punt in his own territory shortly thereafter, but the field goal attempt by St-Louis was blocked by Batty and Ottawa maintained their shut out to that point.

Taking over on their own 39, the Beavers started eating up large chunks of yardage on the ground with HB Chris Rabbit running behind FB Christine Okoye. The drive, which included two runs of 11 yards and one of 18, was capped by a two-yard run by Rabbit which made the score 20-0.

St-Louis found themselves playing 4-down football, and a 4th down sack by Beric landed Ottawa on St-Louis' 40 yard line. The Beavers stayed on the ground to kill the clock and added a 44-yard field goal to extend their lead to 23-0. St-Louis was able to score with a few seconds left on the clock to avoid the shut-out.



Week 4 recap:

Coming off a road loss to Papua, the Beavers were looking to right the ship. Head Coach Captain Canuck made what he admits was a questionable call and sat standout defensive end Eddie Beric for that game, but Beric was fully healthy again and eager to make his mark.

The Beavers got on the board in their second drive by combining short passing with a healthy running game. They drove to the 21 yard line but their offensive struggles resurfaced and the team settled for a 38 yard field field goal. The teams spent the remainder of the first half trading punts, and the Beavers went into the locker room at halftime with a 3-0 lead.

Springfield looked to turn things around early on in the 3rd quarter when they had some success of their own on their second drive. They drove to the Ottawa 20 but consecutive sacks by Roy Batty and Eddie Beric pushed them back to the 33 and the tying field goal attempt fell short.

On their following drive, Springfield threw an interception to safety Bjorn Toby Wilde, which was returned 11 yards to the Springfield 25. Ottawa was again unable to move the ball and settled for a 37 yard field goal and a 6-0 lead.

Ottawa offensive ineptitude meant Springfield still had hope with 5 minutes to play in the fourth quarter, even though they were backed up on their own 13 . They were forced to punt however, and expected to have their defense get the ball back for them. Instead, Eddie Beric crashed through from his end position on the punt rush team and blocked the kick, picked it up and ran it (all of a yard) for the hat trick. The extra point made the score 13-0 for Ottawa.

Springfield mixed in a number of draw plays and medium passes to take the ball to the Ottawa 4 yard line on their next drive but gave the ball up on downs. They did manage to force Ottawa to punt and started their next drive from the Beavers' 42, but Beric sacked the Atoms QB for an 11- yard loss on first down. The Atoms' next two passes were incomplete and Batty added a another sack to his own total to ice the game and give the Beavers a second divisional victory.



Week 2 recap:

The Ottawa management had stated they were looking forward to renewing and revitalising the age-old rivalry between the Comedians and the team formerly known as Anchorage Arbalests (rumours that they had been coerced into saying this by a certain Mr. E. Beric Esq are unproven at time of going to press). And it seems that rivalry may be as intense as ever; stung by the taunts of "big fat poofy homo" that Beric was growling at them, Joe De'Red let some good work go to waste early on when he forced a pass from the Ottawa 39 yard line straight to CB Kert Browning, and the youngster went 72 yards to establish an early lead.

Before the quarter was out, Gart Blade went part of the way to getting payback for the visitors when he picked off Gopher's speculative pass to TE Alan S. Morrisette deep in the Beaver half, and 3 plays later Fettucini got it back to level pegging.

Despite the almost perfect conditions, it seemed to be a day for QB errors, as LB Sonny Gambini again intercepted De'Red dangerously close to his own endzone, and only a heads-up tackle by FB Reggie Cleofus (who did little else on the day) prevented him going more than 21 yards. The Beavers settled for 3 points from Humongous.

The only other score in the first half was early in the 2nd quarter following a textbook coffin corner punt by the Comedians' Cleophus James. On the one yard line, there was obviously some confusion over the play called. Gopher handed the ball to HB Chris Rabbit who looked as if he expected the ball to come to his other side. Inevitably, he fumbled, and although FB Christine Okoye showed some womanly wiles to grab the ball, Safety Phil Halas was through the line like a dose of salts and Chicago grabbed 2 points and possession. They couldn't do anything with it, however, and it was as tight as a gnat's chuff at the break.

Adjustments to the Beavers' Offensive and Defensive strategies, coupled with no change by Chicago, meant that Ottawa finally found the edge they had been lacking in the first half (despite the fact that Beric had already got through to De'Red twice, the greybeard QB still seemed in control). The loss of 2nd TE Adrian Montague to a ruptured tendon after a vicious tackle by Gambini wouldn't have helped De'Red's cause either. Gopher found he had more time than he realised, and started putting some numbers on the board - nothing spectacular, just enough to keep the ball live and get to within range of the Chicago endzone. A 19 yard reception by ex-Rebel WR D.H. Hill got them to the CC 5 and they pounded the ball over in three plays to get an 8 point lead that wiped the smiles from the Comedians' faces. They almost got it back following another perfect punt by James, but this time Gopher did enough to ensure that when Gart Blade sacked him, he was far enough away from the score-zone that a safety wasn't conceded.

De'Red found Beavers coming at him from all angles as the final quarter wore on, and it was this pressure that led to the final interception of the day by James Buttcas. By then, Ottawa had put another TD on the board at the end of a short drive that saw rookie TE Morrisette grab his first pro TD from seven yards out.

So no arguments about the result - Chicago were simply out-coached in the second half. However, with two fabulous punts, Cleophus James may feel aggrieved at not getting an official mention in dispatches for his efforts; hopefully, this redresses the balance somewhat.



Week 1 recap:

Ask ANY PAFL coach or owner the following question: "If you could have ONE player on your team, who would it be?" Chances are, unless they are just being silly (which is quite likely, now that I think about it), you would get the answer "Eddie Beric".

Picking up where he left off in pre-season, the huge Norseman DOMINATED this game and while it was Claude Humungous who got the lion's share of the points for the visitors (4 FGs), Beric simply tore through the Surrealists' O-Line to sack (Spokane QB) Holliday a monster EIGHT times (James Buttcas, Dave Leppard and Ron Maiden got 5 between them). And Spokane's O-Line are no pussycats either. I think they were just shell-shocked by the Beric Blitzkrieg.

Spokane's coaching staff had sprog distractions, but Ottawa also outguessed them pretty effectively. Spokane eschewed the run in favour of its potentially more-devastating pass attack and ran into the Killer B's in top form.

Beaver RB Chris Rabbit showed some of the form he lacked last season with 84 yards, every inch of which he had to fight for, and this took up the slack from Gopher's lacklustre performance. Also up for the praise parade is Ottawa Punter Carlos Fandango, who had a gross average of 42.4 yards and dropped one right on the Spokane 1 yard line.

Showing a fearsome combination of bloodlust and discipline, Roy Batty got around the end and went replicant on Isaac Umminmassa's ass for a safety. Only a 33 yard FG spared the Surrealists the ignominy of a home-tie shutout, which came about as a result of a Charlie Parker pickoff of a Gopher pass deep in Beaver territory.

Spokane never really gave up, going for it on 4th down, but when they came up short they refused to make the same mistake twice. Perhaps losing 17 yards in 3 downs had something to do with it? Humongous got them more than a TD & 2 pt conversion ahead with 35 seconds to go from 43 yards, and the Beavers showed why they are "Fighting".

***Weeks 1, 2, 6 and 7 recap provided by the PAFL league office. The week 3 recap has disappeared due to technical difficulties. Besides, the Beavers lost. Why dwell on it???