Fighting Beavers News and Notes! |
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-------------------- Though he plays very little at the moment, rookie linebacker Jack Hackett's (pictured at left) status as a first round pick (with the Minnesota Fats, at the time) still holds some clout. It is believed that Hackett will soon sign an endorsement deal with a prominent beauty and skin care company to do modelling work for them. It was not known at press time wether Hackett would be posing for the "before" or "after" picture, though insiders feel that perhaps he'd be better suited for the "before" shot. -------------------- |
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BEAVERS SPLIT ON RULES CHANGE The PAFL has made a mid-season rules change that may add some balance to Beavers games in the future. Since the beginning of the season, the Beavers have been spectacular on defense while struggling to score points on offense. The league has determined that this problem was not unique to the Fighting Beavers. Defensive standouts were accumulating quarterback sacks at an alarming rate and the brass felt that this issue had to be addressed. Starting with the week 6 contests, the offensive linemen will be allowed to spread out a little wider, and a little further back from the line of scrimmage. In theory, this should allow the faster offensive linemen to take advantage of their speed as they set up to protect the pass, while limiting (but not eradicating) somewhat the effectiveness of speed rushers. Simply put, the guards and tackles will have a split second longer to set up a pass-block. Not everyone is ecstatic with this decision. Beavers defensive end Eddie Beric referred to the ruling as "a load of horse\$#!t" and the league office as "a bunch of whipped tw#t$". But offensive players, quarterbacks in particular, look forward to the extra time to execute their plays, even if that extra time is minimal. "I was sacked 9 times in Papua." QB Gordon D. Gopher stated, "If I never have to go through that again I'll be perfectly happy." Head Coach Captain Canuck is largely indifferent to the change. "It's of no real consequence to me. As long as we all play by the same rules, I have no concerns about it. We'll just have to adapt to it, like everyone else." |
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