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The Fighting Beavers Coaching Staff! |  |
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The Men (and woman) Who Will Lead the Fighting Beavers to Glory! |
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Head Coach: Captain Canuck The Ultimate Tribute to Captain Canuck page probably explains it better, in less time, than I ever could... ---------- Captain Canuck was a Canadian comic book published in the mid-'70s and the early '80s. A mixture of superhero, James Bond, and science fiction, the series was about a costumed hero/government agent who battled evil throughout Canada, the world, and beyond, in what was then the future (the 1990s). ---------- The Captain will run the team highlighting enthusiasm, fairness and hard work. For more information on Captain Canuck please see co-creator Richard Comely's site, as well as the Tribute site mentionned above. Links to both are included on the Links Page. |
| Offensive Co-ordinator: Johnny Canuck (no relation) The pre-season has shown that the offense is lacking in big play performers. Someone with a never-say-die attitude, the ability to motivate and a great deal of patience was needed to overcome that hurdle, and Johnny Canuck was obviously the best man for the job. Christine Okoye, a big, fast fullback, was obtained in a trade (with the Portsmouth Plankton) and is considered an upgrade at that position. So much so in fact that Johnny designed the offense around her somewhat to maximize the amount of time she spends on the field, wether she's blocking, receiving, etc. Johnny has gone to great lengths to ensure that each individual was put in a position to make use of his (or her) stronger attributes. Hopefully this will help boost an offense that was dead last in the PAFL in Season 2 in total yards from scrimmage (by a significant margin) while in Minnesota. Johnny Canuck, "Canada's answer to Nazi oppression", was created by Leo Bachle and first appeared in Dime Comics #1 (February 1942). |
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Defensive Co-ordinator: Puck Despite his diminutive stature, Puck is a tough, hard-nosed character. This is expected to be reflected in his defensive unit. Defensive ends Eddie Beric and Roy Batty are standouts and seem to enjoy having been let loose in Puck's scheme. Beric, in fact, had 9 sacks in a pre-season contest against the Shelbyville Poptarts! Puck has not shown a specific preference for a defensive formation (4-3, 3-4, etc.) as of yet. His team will line up in a number of different formations in order to cause confusion in the opposing offense. Like Johnny Canuck, Puck has attempted to ensure that his best personel is on the field at all times. Puck is a member of Alpha Flight, Canada's own superhero group, and among the most poorly handled cast of characters in Marvel Comics' history. Mind you that's just my opinion. I could be wrong. But I'm not. |
| Special Teams Coach: Dudley Do-Right Now it should be noted that marrying one's HORSE is illegal in Canada (as far as I know, anyway...I've never actually looked it up). I don't recall that particular episode of Dudley Do-Right, but I'm sure that there's a very good reason for his actions as I doubt he'd EVER knowingly break the law no matter how fond he is of his beast of burden. If someone IS aware of the situation taking place in this clip, by all means E-Mail me (address on the Contact Page) and let's set the record straight. |
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Miscellaneous Tasks: Mr. Canoehead Mr Canoehead is in charge of "the little things" such as retrieving the kicking tees after kickoffs, ensuring that there are enough halftime oranges for all the players, keeping the buckets of refreshing iced maple syrup full, and making sure that every player leaving the showers has immediate access to a toasty warm towel. Here, for whatever reason, Mr Canoehead is doing battle with an evil nun, who appears to have some knowledge of the martial arts. This clearly illustrates Canoehead's willingness to "take one for the team". |
| Tylene Buck as Major Gunns (World Championship Wrestling) The Beavers don't have a specific role for Buck...but who cares really? She's just nice to have around. Tylene's own site is offered up on the links page. It only makes sense to have access to it made as easy and fast as possible. |
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Strength and Conditioning Coach: Elvis Gratton Mr Gratton has been tabbed as the man who will assist the players in achieving their physical potential, much like he has. There is no denying his love for his country and the inspiration and motivation he provides through three simple words... "Think BIG, 'sti!" |
| Director of Public and Media Relations: Reid Fleming, World's Toughest Milkman Fleming takes no crap. More than once known to exclaim "I thought I told you to shut up!", and not one to keep his thoughts and opinions to himself, Canuck feels that Fleming is more than capable of handling himself in front of the cutthroat, vicious Ottawa media. At right, we have a typical start to a Reid Fleming kind of day. Fleming was created by one David Boswell and his adventures first saw publication in 1980. |
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Head of Security: Red Ketchup When the Honolulu Alohas dropped by for a game recently, Captain Canuck suspected that perhaps the second-hand "Mary-Jew-Anna" smoke coming from their locker room may have caused the Beavers to play a subpar game. To that end, he decided to tighten security around the stadium and practice facilities. Albino, Canadian born Red Ketchup is a former Detroit police officer and FBI agent. While himself suspected to have had issues with substance abuse, he has met with success in every mission undertaken in large part because of his unwavering drive to see the job done, something Captain Canuck preaches endlessly to his players. He once clamped jumper cable grips around a suspect's testicles in order to get him to divulge information, showing not only tenacity and focus, but resourcefulness as well. He is so highly respected, in fact, that his enemies have even tried to clone him, as witnessed on the picture on the left. Red Ketchup was created by Réal Godbout and Pierre Fournier. |
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Head Scout: The Lone Rider |
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